We all have that bunch of relatives, colleagues and pseudo friends who are vying to be a part of your inner circle. They want to know exactly how much you make and how much you save. Even if you considered yourself to be pretty financially secure, they have the ability to make you feel like you earn peanuts. The ones who want to crack some ice and know your money matters. Their nosiness and curiosity gets beyond endurance and since killing is illegal…we suggest Sarcasm.
We’ve compiled here five replies to the age old question, “You work so hard and miss out on so many family moments. Is the salary really that good?”
1. “Yep! My family pays me double to stay out of the house after all…I’m…”
This reply is definitely going to get that curious neighbour out of your salary sensitive issue and wonder what more is being concealed from her/him. Watch them flounder for words as they compose themselves to deal with the misleading titbit you gave them. Give yourself a pat for having their imagination run wild and suffer sleepless nights.
2. “Half your worth.”
The three simple words strung together and said with a poker straight face will have the nosy monger move away at the earliest. You can be certain of their silent huffing and puffing at their idiocy for having posed that question to you in the first place.
3. “Are you seeking a loan? I charge 19% interest.”
This excited, enthusiastic response in absolute gaiety followed by a string of another twenty questions with regard to their finances is going to keep you rolling on your sides with laughter for a long time. It’s like they need you to admit that you earn peanuts (even if you don’t!) to feel secure about their own finances. This clingy approach with the reply will send them reeling into another zone and you can be sure that any gathering or otherwise, they’ll make the effort to not cross your path, ever again.
4. “I don’t wake up for less than 10k a day. And yeah, thanks for reminding, I haven’t received the money for today.”
This self-assured reply as a light hearted banter is definitely going to make them puzzled and confused on whether they should laugh or take you seriously. The confusion will reign and you will be left alone while they struggle in the mental agony.
5.“Just enough to pay the five EMIs, bills, ration for the month…I guess.”
The plainly said statement with a tinge of little sadness and yes, the expectant hope in your eyes is the key to put them off. It is like you are asking for their help because you earn peanuts. List out your exaggerated yet believable expenses and watch their horror. The feeling that they owe you something or you expect them to make things all right for you will make them leave quickly with a sympathetic smile without pestering you further about your salary, hikes or expenses.
If none of these work out, use the Malcolm Forbes strategy and tell them you make your money ‘the old-fashioned way’. You believe in being nice to wealthy relatives before their death. A coy smile with that and you’ll have the ball rolling in your favour.
What do you do to tackle such nosey questions? Tell us at firstname.lastname@example.org